Folks, I know I’ve been blowing up your inboxes a lot more than usual. (And there’ll be another short Tuesday newsletter next week.)* But I come to you today on behalf of a good cause.
I’m “running” in Sidewalk’s Bad Movie Marathon! And I need your help to do it.
What does this all mean? Well, next weekend, I’ll be joining a dozen other maniacs as we watch one “bad movie” after another for as long as we can stay awake. (If you fall asleep, you’re done!) And we’ll be raising funds leading up to and during the marathon to help the Sidewalk Cinema and the Sidewalk Film Festival keep the lights on. They’re a nonprofit, you know.
That’s the simple explanation. Here’s how the whole thing actually works. All of your dollars go to Sidewalk in the end, but they support the marathoners through tangible means along the way. For example, $50 will earn them a hot meal, $100 will earn them a blanket and a pillow, $300 will earn them a 30-minute nap, etc.** The list of perks gets more interesting as the amounts get higher, and our competitive edges are sure to get fiercer as we get loopier from sleep deprivation.
This will actually be my second edition. My friend Ali Clark and I participated as a team in the first ever Bad Movie Marathon in 2020, but she and her husband just moved to Los Angeles, so I’m flying solo this year. We lasted roughly 26 hours, and I’m hoping to at least match that mark on my own this time around.
I know what you’re wondering: “What kind of ‘bad movies’ will you be watching anyway?” Well, reader, the 2020 marathon took place in December, which meant we were subjected to bad Christmas movie, and it was hilariously miserable. I watched such non-classics as A Rose For Christmas and A Puppy For Christmas and A Husband For Christmas and other films where a woman may or may not get something for Christmas.*** At the very least, I can take solace in knowing that this year’s lineup won’t be Christmas movies. (Or will it…?)
But as I said earlier, I need your help—and you can donate here! Just make sure you select my name under the “Credit someone with my gift” section.
At the very least, I’ll need meals and caffeine to survive, and I sure wouldn’t mind that pillow too. If things go really well, I could even maintain a competitive edge against my opponents. (Did I mention that several of my friends are participating as well? But you should donate only to me, not them, of course.) Every dollar is genuinely appreciated—by me, but also by the entire Sidewalk team. It takes a village to bring independently curated films to our fair city!
Thank you for reading. Thank you for supporting. Please pray for my sanity.
*If you didn’t read the last mid-week update, I’m hosting another edition of VHS Time Machine at the Sidewalk Cinema on Thursday, January 18th! And it’s free! More on that next week…
**The nap perk is a mirage. I tried taking an hour-long nap during the first Bad Movie Marathon. I laid down around 10:00 a.m. after being up all night and my brain was like “No sir, it’s a new day, you had your chance to sleep.” What a load of crap.
***We also watched films like Ernest Saves Christmas and Silent Night, Deadly Night, but that must’ve been a programming glitch of some sort, since those are good movies.
I think you’re gonna experience more DCOMS this year!
this looks so fun omg